Look! Anna and I at a real-life book event! We are two 2020 lockdown debut authors, so I still find it hard to believe this actually happened. It is a night I will treasure forever. Thank you, Anna, for being such a dynamic host. Needless to say, time has run away from us and we are a little late with this edition of the newsletter. What we won’t be doing is holding ourselves to strict, imaginary deadlines and beating ourselves up about falling behind. What we will be doing is jamming this edition with so much *content* you will forget time even exists (welcome to our world).
The Overshare is broken up into seven sections: Listen Up–for all things auditory and musical, All The Feels–for sensory gadgets and neurodivergent products we are loving, Off The Shelf–bookish things including what we are reading and upcoming events, Uh Oh–life disasters, bloopers and social mistakes, Leaving The House–pretty self explanatory, Who Put Me In Charge–challenges in parenting, executive functioning, and life admin, and Scratch Pad–to share new writing bits and pieces. Let’s do it.
Listen Up
Kay: I am a longtime listener, and now first-time guest on Novel Feelings, a podcast with a unique approach to talking about books. Priscilla and Elise are two psychologists and avid readers, who discuss mental health representations in books–where it is done well, and when it could be better.
One of the best parts of this interview was getting to dive into Please Don’t Hug Me in a deep, spoilery way that I haven’t had a chance to do up until now. Listen to the chat to hear what they think of Erin’s psychologist, Dr Lim, and a bit more about Social Queue as well.
I would also love to recommend this podcast episode of So You Want To Be A Writer, featuring YA author and Survivor superstar Wai Chim. It is a great chat, and I found it comforting to know that Wai’s approach to figuring out which story ideas have legs is similar to mine (the old ‘write and write and write and after thousands of words you will finally figure it out, no shortcuts allowed’ method).
All the feels
Kay: People keep telling me Christmas is coming and to order things early and I know I should be doing that, but I absolutely am not. I am thinking about doing it though, so that counts for something. Right? One of the things I am thinking about getting is a hammock swing or ‘therapy swing’. Do companies just pop the word ‘therapy’ on something and then add an additional zero to the cost? I am overwhelmed with options. I think one of those lycra cocoon type swings would be nice and calming, but what about a swing seat for outside or a traditional hammock that comes with a stand? If anyone has any recommendations I would love to hear them.
Anna: ‘All the feels’ is just my whole life at the moment. This is confession time. I have taken to reading in bed… without clothes on. Don’t panic! This isn’t going to get R+!! It’s a sensory break I never knew I needed on a daily basis. I did learn in Melbourne a few years ago, while attending the Emerging Writers Festival, that going back to the hotel didn’t help if I just kept wearing the same clothes, or changed straight into evening attire. I needed my skin to have a break. When I’m over stimulated and my bucket is full, I need nothing restricting (shed the same clothing that made me feel safe and contained in the morning). It worked! I could then get dressed and go out for an awesome evening with @cakeandmadness. And now, with current mental health struggles, I need this break every day at home. It’s also the only place I can lock the door and be inaccessible. I’ll just go hide and pretend I didn’t fess up to all this now hehehe.
Off the shelf
Anna: My mind is still in Kay’s novel Social Queue! I tend to read less than Kay (obviously) but read and reread very deeply. I love annotating and scribbling on the pages. I still underline like I’m reading for an assignment - or in this case for our interview - as it keeps my mind on the book. ADHD and dyslexia have considerable overlap, and while I’m not diagnosed as dyslexia I relate strongly to the symptoms… The irony is not lost on me! Holding a pencil and keeping a ‘searching for the quotes’ mentality helps me. THAT IS until I read anything by Kay Kerr. I want to underline *everything* and have so many washi tape markers that they lose all meaning! Her writing speaks right to the heart of my experience of life. Social Queue is a must read for everyone over 13/14, and I was incredibly honoured to help launch this addition to own voices autistic texts. I’ll go cry quietly now, with happy tears.
Kay: Thank you, that means so much to me. As I ride the rollercoaster of launch month, reading has been a grounding counterbalance. Sometimes I think I am not quite cut out for the publicity side of things, because it is overwhelming and it feels like I could burst into tears at any given moment, just from the sheer force of having my work and my personality so publicly perceived. And other times it’s fine and I get buzzy from the connections made and the conversations had. I think rest is the key ingredient. But reading, reading I can always do. Here are my latest recommendations:
The Deep End by Jenna Guillaume is a YA romance novella that came out recently as part of the Australia Reads campaign. I wish this format was more of a thing, or else I wish Jenna could write 100 more stories just like this because it is perfect. I loved the length, ideal for pandemic levels of focus, and it is such a sweet, funny, romantic Australian story that starts at a school swimming carnival! Is there any school event worse??
Anything But Fine by Tobias Madden is a stunning debut #LoveOzYA novel. It is funny, heartfelt, authentic, and beautifully rendered. Luca is a dancer who breaks his foot right before a big audition, which means he loses his scholarship, has his dreams dashed, and has to start over at a new school. The characters felt so real I found myself thinking of them long after I had finished reading this (Amina forever!) and the book was uplifting in exactly the way I am searching for at the moment. I can’t wait to chat with Tobias as part of Sydney Writers’ Festival Secondary School Days next year.
I have also recently loved Cherry Beach by Laura McPhee-Browne for its big feelings and tender-hearted protagonist, and A Room Called Earth by Madeleine Ryan for neurodivergent representation that stopped me in my tracks and made me rethink the way I frame my self talk.
Uh oh
Kay: If I were prone to dramatics, I would say that EVERY TIME I try to book myself something pamper-ish, it goes awry. Of course that is not true, but it certainly feels that way. Take, for example, my decision to get an eyelash lift ahead of my book launch. It is a fairly low-key treatment where a beautician curls your eyelashes with a perming solution, so they stay that way for a couple of weeks. Easy, right? You would think so. Enter, stage right, my interoception issues. About three minutes after the lovely woman had applied the perming solution, essentially gluing my eyes shut, I realised I was busting for the toilet. No, it didn’t occur to me to go before having my eyes glued shut for forty minutes. Yes, it was the most discomfort I have ever been in. Truly horrendous. My internal monologue for that entire time was ‘OMG I NEED TO GO TO THE TOILET THIS IS AWFUL WHEN WILL IT BE OVER I WONDER IF I CAN ASK THE WOMAN TO WALK ME TO THE TOILET THIS IS SO BAD MAYBE I WILL JUST BAIL ON THE WHOLE THING IT WOULD BE WORTH IT THIS IS AWFUL PLEASE WHEN WILL IT BE OVER’, accompanied by some nice meditation music. Super relaxing times.
Anna: OMG Yes! What Kay said!!! I used to get my eyelashes tinted and above is my exact experience plus the dye seeping into my eyes and stinging and I thought I might be permanently damaging my eyes every time. I don’t go any more! I’d love a massage though - but Ehlers Danlos Syndrome is not well understood by the local parlour where I used to go before I was diagnosed. They loved how far they could stretch my joints… and complained at how tight my muscles were in other places. I would always feel shell-shocked when I left, with good muscle pain but sore joints. Now I realise how easily my joints just pull out of place and my osteopath nearly choked when I mentioned the regular massages! So I just don’t go anywhere.
Leaving the house
Anna: Okay. WE LEFT THE HOUSES. Both of us!! I hope you are all super proud! I decided not to drive. I then chickened out on the bus and got a lift in - but I really wanted to wear those boots as I never ever wear heels or boots any more and I just wanted to wear the boots okay? Seeing Kay and Arthur before the event was just the best, getting to relax with people who won’t judge is… relaxing? I still have no idea what I said at the launch, as I was just giddy happy to be in the bookstore, a crowd of friendly faces (so many people I actually knew and who I really really like) and of course - KAY!!! I am terrible at lying, as you all know, so I gushed like crazy over Social Queue and panicked that I was forgetting to say the proper things. My insides just wanted to jump and dance and cry at the monumental achievement to publish a second book that is SO good. I may have had some wine too. I then ate dinner with a skeleton and it was very tasty. I went out. It was good. Maybe I’ll try it again next year.
Kay: Anna, you were brilliant. I don’t really remember what I said either, but it felt so GOOD to be at a book event at a bookshop, surrounded by other people who love books! Of course in-person events are far more mentally and physically taxing than Zoom ones, but in this instance it was worth the output. Thank you to everyone who came along.
Also a huge thank you to Rhiannon Wilde and everyone who came along to my Sunshine Coast event. It was another beautiful night. Rhiannon has just sold the US rights to Henry Hamlet’s Heart, and sold her second YA novel to UQP. Exciting times!
Who put me in charge?
Anna: Parenting. In two weeks I’ve had one child fail her driving licence twice, another turn fourteen, and the youngest tell me that if I was punched in the face every time she said ‘I love you’ to me I’d be dead. Aww bless. I also spent an hour looking for a 5cm long praying mantis my youngest found and then dropped on the way home from school. One kilometre of roadside to search. No worries. My heart reached 160bpm three times (thank you to my blood pressure issues) but I persevered due to the giant ploppy tears that fell from her face. We didn’t find it, or one, until the next day. The lucky stick-thing now lives in the dry tank with her harlequin bugs. Yes, I take the little things seriously (like finding a bug) because I want her to know I care when I otherwise may not show my affection. I also love her passion for insects! Always support the passions, or they may stop having any, and I can’t think of anything more sad than a passion-less life.
Kay: I’ve had a really hard week parenting :( My daughter had a dental procedure that required a general anaesthetic and the whole hospital visit and subsequent week have been a nightmare, if I am honest. The hospital was so dysregulating and overwhelming for her, and as nice as the staff were, there was a lot of advocating required to get A’s needs met. Things I guess people don’t necessarily think of, like dimming lights in recovery, having more flexibility over what is eaten (or not eaten), or telling a child what you are about to do to them, before you do it (I’m looking at you, person who ripped the bandaid off a kid with a huge bandaid phobia). I’m so grateful for the people who looked after us, and especially the anaesthetist who had personal experience with young autistic people, and knew exactly how to handle things. We have been doing the stuff that helps with regulation, and we are getting there, it just takes time. I hate seeing her struggling, and in this instance, it was something that had to be done.
Scratch pad
Kay: I wrote a piece for The Guardian about relationships, writing a romance novel, and the movie Grease. You can read it here. There have been some interesting reactions to this piece, but I am so proud of it and of myself for choosing truth over comfort.
Anna: I almost want to apologise for inflicting my poetry on you all but this is my outlet. Imagine one day I’ll be some dead writer and they’ll collect them all and ooh and ahh and try to find meaning. Hehe.
Hope
The orange is sour
and tastes of trying.
Hope licks the pain,
wounds of iron and plasma.
I love you less
as the juices enter.
My life shivers
trying ferments poorly.
I pretend not to notice,
swallowing the rancid flesh.
Together we will
turn away and smile.
Mmm lovely and fresh!
Thank you, let’s walk.
There are no words to explain the gratitude I feel for your emails. I love that they are written to work in with your lives as they are a refreshing surprise in my inbox everytime.
There is a massive need for hospitals to learn how to be ND friendly. We’ve been on the receiving end of ridicule in the past.
Anna I love the idea of a naked reset if you need to do two events in one day 😱. I also find wearing a sleep mask to be great.
Thank you both I love your The Overshare